Thursday, May 23, 2013

The Call of Duty Dog and You

With the recent reveal of Call of Duty: Ghosts, people have been very excited about the inclusion of a tactical dog partner. The reasons are obvious, the dog is cute and the footage of a real dog being motion captured was even more cute. I hate to rain on everyone's parade, but this can only end in one of a few ways, especially with the writer talking about how he expects you to be forming all these deep, personal bonds with the characters.

1. The Dog Dies

Near the end of the game, about forty five minutes in, the dog will die in either a cheesy heroic act or a cheesy “shocking” and sudden cutscene. With the franchise's history of low brow shock value moments, my money is on the latter. The player character will be all sad for a few moments, and the player will be at least a little sad because a dog dying is always sad, but the moment will undermined by the fact that the player character has, up to this point, already killed hundreds of human beings, whom will never go home to their families or pet dogs again.

2. You Die

The player character dies because this is war and that sort of thing happens. The last thing the player sees is the dog looking sad and licking the player character's face, which is to say the screen. It would be a bit schmaltzy, but this is probably the best case scenario.

3. You Are The Dog

This isn't going to happen, but I might actually play a new Call of Duty game if the assumed player characters dies in the opening cutscene, then the player goes on a rampage of revenge as the dog with a side-mounted chain-gun and the ability to bark in air strikes.

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